From College...to the Corporate World...

Its been around 4 months in the Corporate World, and i cant help thinking of how much i miss college life. Nostalgic feelings fill my dreamy head as i wake up every day to reach the save point at the end of the monotonous mission thrown right at my face. Its a difficult transition, from freedom to responsibility, from to sophistication, from whole-hearted laughs to artificial smirks, a transition that I am still a part of, a change that I am accepting.

The funniest thing at work is the IDCard.It is supposed to be worn around our neck, like the tag on clothing apparel in a shopping mall.I'm not sure how you guys take it but it feels very awkward to have it hanging around your neck.I simply prefer to tucking it away in my pocket. The ID card I had at college was used only for cutting my birthday cake once a year, and for exams, just in case the profs wanted to make sure that we did exist on campus, and not figments of imagination developed as a byproduct of their brain storming sessions with the late Fouriers and Laplaces. The IDcard at work must be produced everywhere you go, swiped everytime you enter and exit and if you are lucky enough, u can have privilege to swipe it before and after a pee too!

The next thing that comes to mid at work are status updates. You are given assignments on campus and given a deadline. You submit the assignment, you get marks, and there you go away with a happy A or a comforting B or a sac C. At work, you have stand-up meetings everyday for an hour, a weekly meeting summarizing the daily updates of the entire week and finally a monthly team meeting to summarize the weekly updates. And to be a part of this whole "updating the updated updates" is worse than writing all my CDC compres on the same day.

And once you get started with whatever you are doing, you always have the arduous task of socializing with your surrounding people. There is something wonderful called ragging (or "was" rather). Guess ur too old for that once you start working. People are uptight, every request is prefixed with a please and every conversation is suffixed with a thanks, followed by an aritificially induced smile implying "please get lost". I perfected my prefixes and suffixes, but still working on that smile. Its just that cracking too many PJs with other lazy people over a fried maggi and coffee in ANC has affected my way of smiling. Its not cool to make fun of people, or have saracastic remarks made on others anymore.Your best jokes often go by unnoticed. And sadly, a brave and self-sacrificing effort to make yourself a complete idiot and have a heart laugh over it is never appreciated. So, instead of dreaming to bask in the glory of a joke at yourself, keep your mouth shut the next time you've got your id card around your neck.

I will never know if those 4 years at college will be the best years of my life, but I am sure I will remember them for a long time to come.

Name Blame

I hate my name. Yes i really do! The whole story is hilarious. For those of you who still don't know, here goes. It was supposed to be Ashwini Chandra, named after the first star in the sky (don't know how it gets to be the first). Not that this name is any better, its worse.
Its two girl names combined to a boy name. I still remember, there was a girl named Ashwini in the same class during my UKG. Every time during attendance, both of us used to stand up for the same name. Trust me, its humiliating. Luckily i got to go to another school where there were no Ashwini's in my class (girls and boys), which made it a lot easier. Things were fine until i received my 10th class hall ticket, where it was printed Ashwani. I went to the principal for a request to change my name...and there comes in the irony. I was shown my birth certificate which i gave them at the time of joining, and it was actually Ashwani Chandra.......
That is when i knew my name...amazed at this discovery, i told my parents and all my friends, started changing my name on the labels of my books.

I guess I'm the only idiot alive who got to know his name at 15 years. This name was worse. No one could ever pronounce it properly. People start making a "Ashh...Ashh...Ashh..." sound and i answer to that to go collect my answer sheets. I still wonder how i got that name.

I still can recollect the incident, after my 1st year 1st sem 1st tutorial in thermodynamics. He was distributing papers when he called out my name and placed it in the middle of the 4 girls in our class. He was not fully convinced when i told him it was my paper. He was still under the impression that i was collecting the paper for the girl who was absent that day.

Why!!! I always wonder why my parents never thought it would be weird to have a girl name for a guy. I always wonder why I dint have the brains to get it changed when I was young.
I could have been named X, why not. That's what u do in a math problem, the first variable is always an X. I was the eldest among all my cousins, so why don't i deserve to get the X?. The rest of my cousins could be named whatever they want, or just x1, x2, x3 and so on.....
Even variables in java have clearer and meaningful names. Thanks to the coding standards and naming conventions.....Seriously....when was the last time u had "int i" and made it past the code review stage?
I seriously believe they should have a naming convention for humans also.....International Union of Names (IUN) is that so hard???

Thanks to my certificates, I now have it on my ID card, my Access Card, on my nameplate and finally my personal machine at work also has the same name :(.

Well, its good that a lot of people have weird names, but a girl name? both the first and last of it? Every time i introduce myself, i have to say it like three times. Every time i say my name, i have to spell it out to make sure he doesn't make a worse name of my already existing one.
There are 265 members on facebook who hate their name....and I'm in there....
Check this out on facebook

Enjoy Maadi

Another Friday was on the verge of termination, just then i realized that i needed a hard copy of my midterm report to get it spiral bound and submit it on Monday. So i lingered along the office,got a copy of it and went to my room late at 8pm. ( i dint work that hard...it was the Bangalore traffic that delayed my return to the room). Well... there starts my weekend. This time, nothing was planned for, nothing was expected. But it turned out to be quite different. 

It was just another Saturday morning, and as the others left for invigilation of the DLPD exam, 

there were just 3 of us left. The morning passed by, quite uneventfully till lunch. It was obviously a Biryani Day, like just every other day that follows a Friday and comes before a 

Sunday. But, what we we did after lunch was what mattered most. I will not say it was completely impromptu or a rattlepated decision made in a  split second, of course it was planned to be executed to perfection an hour before. 

We skipped icecream tentatively and as Mahesh and Ohmkar went to the theatre to get tickets, i hurried to my room to change my shorts. Well, its the latest Upendra Movie in Karnataka, Buddivantha. 

Yup.... you heard it right, yup... i don't understand a bit of Kannada except "madi", "solpha" and "hela" and the "Silkeeeeboarrd and IDEEPUYOOOL" shouts in the private buses, yup... I am an Upendra fan :P (just kidding). Mahesh's foot was bleeding as he kicked some ass out of anxiety, we jostled in the queue for the tickets (its just 50 bucks...in Bangalore that is next to impossible) and realized we still had time to relish our traditional ice-cream after biryani. Real Star Uppi Dada, as the people fondly refer to him here, 6(7 different) roles, 6 pack, 6 songs, and 5 heroines in a movie. Man... that was something. A whole role in telugu imitating our very dear SamaraSimhaReddy factionism and spoofing the Dhoom and Krish (Khush) flicks as well. A role as a baba who marries a girl promising her to take her to heaven as he is the "passport" was beyond imagination. Well I now have an answer to the question "What did u see in Bangalore?" as i can say "Uppi Dada movi 2nd day :D"

Time flew past swiftly... and I was going home that weekend. My ticket was confirmed and the next day morning there i was in Hyd..the city of Biryani. As soon as i got out of the station i could here the "Maaaki Kirkiri" and "Kaiku Miyaaan" among the auto drivers. Then I got into a running bus to reach my home.What a contrast to the "solpha" and "madi" of Kannada. And then of course it was followed by the Haleem and Biryani stuff. The return journey was quite amazing. I was surrounded by a bunch of school kids going for an excurison to Bangalore. Had some really weird experiences there... 8th class kids calling me Uncle and a discussion on "how stars shine" at 4 o clock in the morning. The train was 3 hours late, which added to my woes. :( :( :(

 

Bloody Bangalore...it rains all the time and it is such a pain in the ass...

 

I have recently developed a strong desire to see Kannada video songs...i swear...they are better than a few balayya movies ( no offence). The choreography is mind blowing...one must see it to believe it. Well... it all boils down to one thing...how to make the worst possible video for a very nice song. I shall get them back to campus next sem and share it on DC++. Too many holidays...too many birthdays...to many people writing GRE...too many things at PS that I don't understand how to do...that pretty much sums up my October in Bangalore.

OBLIVIOS TRIO

Wow...IPhone with 3G technology ...or... Cool comp dude!!!. Hail the Newtons and the Einsteins... Charles Babbage, Alexander Graham Bell and my dearest Fourier. Well they are all scientists or inventors or pioneers occupying quite some place in our textbooks. What would the world be like without them? The answer is quotidian..."unimaginable" and sometimes "who are they?".

Well, for a change, lets talk about someone else. Its a Friday evening, and if it wasn't for my mid semester report,I would have been in my room. I would like to do so many things at this hour, but can do only a few. As i sat there, gazing into the reflection of the green meadows on my monitor(bloody no LCD monitors yet!), waiting for free snacks, i sat down to blog about someone else. Three discoveries/inventions, never talked about much.

Well, the third best invention would go to the deodorant.Axe, Denim, Park Avenue, Brut...whatever they may be. It just gives u a good reason not to take bath on a early sunny summer morning, in turn saving water, which saves money and so on and so forth. Deodorant as we know it today started with the original formulation for Mum deodorant that was invented in 1888, by an unknown inventor from Philadelphia. Helen Barnett developed an underarm deodorant and was tested in the USA in 1952, and marketed under the name of Ban Roll-On. Got to meet your girl after a hard days work? simple... it hardly takes 5 seconds to "deo" yourself, thought it might take sometime locating your deo. Have to run to an exam early morning? Grab a deo from your wingies and "pshhhhhhh..." there you go!

Back from snacks!!!We are now provided free snacks too :D

The second best invention is the ice-cream...isn't it delicious...after a sumptuous meal, an ice cream is always welcome. There is always the risk of addiction, but this is certainly better than most other addictions. African American, Augustus Jackson was a candy confectioner from Philadelphia who can be called the inventor of ice cream around 1832. In 1846, Nancy Johnson patented a hand-cranked freezer that established the basic method of making ice cream still used today. William Young patented the similar "Johnson Patent Ice-Cream Freezer" in 1848.I seriously think he deserves a Nobel Prize. Isn't it awesome, the most delicious semi-solid substance on earth, at a cheap and affordable price. I proudly say that we get an ice-cream for lunch every Monday at our office :P

The best invention of all time is the "SNOOZE" button. Man..that's the best thing that ever happened to earth after the invention of the disastrous alarm clock. What a remedy to the malaise!As the sun rises and a new day dawns upon you, the alarm explodes and u casually roll over and slam it right on its head. Wow...isn't it a nice way to steal a few mun Most of you would be really surprised to know that Lew Wallace is the person who invented the snooze button. Lew Wallace is the author of the book Ben Hur. An epic Hollywood blockbuster that still holds its own even today, even becoming a part of the English vernacular with the term "Bigger than Ben Hur". Well thanks to this legend, we can sleep for a few extra minutes before we go and face the humdrum of life.

Well...there are many more like these...and I'm sure you will be thinking more of them or doing something equivalently useless if you are as bored as me :P

METAL INQUISITION-Death Magnetic

Well... the ninth studio album from Metallica, Newstead substituted by Trujillo. What can we expect? A collection of classics? A shitload of trashcan banging by a bunch of boozers? A mixture of some melliflous solos and riffs? In this predicament, i would certainly look forward for anything better than St.Anger, something which is just not "bang bang dum dum"... may be they will lack the flair and melody of Black and Ride the Lightning, the tempo and variations of Master of Puppets, but retain a tinge of their old legacy, a style of their own and James' vocals. Thanks to some Monsieur/Madame/Mademosellie in Paris, and Rapidshare which gave me the new album and my PS where im given coffee, lunch, high speed internet, stipend and time to crap all over the net, here it goes. 

The long awaited album from the boozers has 10 songs out of which one is deviod of James' vocals. Its a pity that Unforgiven III has to be there in this... not that its too bad, but nowhere comparable to its predecessors. Starts of slowly, and if im not wrong its a keyboard(my apologies if it isnt keyboard and violon) and then ends with a good solo. 

"The Day that Never Comes" was used for the publicity stunt, and once agian...its not the "One" of  ...And Justice for all nor "Nothing Else Matters" of Black nor " Fade to Black" of Ride the Lightning, but nevertheless a good song. 

"Suicide and Redemption" is a good one, but with too many repetitions of the same riffs. 

The rest of them are good and bad in their own ways, but overall a very satisfying album compared with the last 3 or 4 of them. With Metallica lowering their bar everytime exponentially since Black, it might take more than a miracle to come up with another Black.

No wonder Ulrich says it makes no difference to them if the album leaked, they cant go firing all guns against some rapidshare this time, must have had enough with Napster. Lets all relish the faint flavour of the "Old Metallica" and be glad that Kirk's solos are still alive. 

Ive got time and Ive got space and I am no Einstein to derive relationships between them, so let me give it a rating... 3/5. That must satisfy most of them. 

Almost forgot... for those who want to download Metallica Death Magnetic: http://rapidshare.com/files/142345199/metdmr-fjortiso.rar

10 reasons why Hyd rocks and Bang sucks!

1. Chicken Biryani...hyderabadi style. Though restaurants boast of hyderabadi biryani being available, its nothing like it.

2. Road side food... U can fill your stomach for 20 bucks at any chat bhandar, or Chinese fast food, its delicious. Bang road side food has nothing in it, and gives u a stomach-ache.

3. Traffic... Hyd traffic is bad, but Bang is worse. At least u don't see an armada of motorcycles going on the footpath, following a queue system. And u have to wait for an eternity for the signal to change from red to green.

4. A movie at any decent theater costs u 160 on weekdays, and it can go up to 200, 250, ,or eve 440 if you are destined to lose money. Popcorn starts at 50 ( the roadside one). I still remember in pilani u spend 10 bucks and u get enough popcorn for 3 people to last a movie. Pepsi also starts from 50..and they can go upto 100, varying in size, taste and color. Imax or PVR in Hyd is not costly anymore, the only place u can see a movie in bang for 100 bucks is in a non-ac theatre.

5. Sight seeing... U only have places in bangalore to go on a date with ur girlfriend, parks, gardens and the list goes on... nothing much at which u can stare at and say "wow...!" or"hmmm...". ISKON temple u might say... ive seen it. A multiplex with a temple on the top floor, thats what describes it best. A place to have gobi manchuria for "prasadam". Hyd again, totally roxx; charminar, tombs, birla temple, what not....

6. MG bus station is in now way comparable to Majestic Bus station and so is the railway station; no more questions

7.Telugu movies, anytime better than Kannada movies.

8.You can make a fortune out of a small building, extorting money from tenants as advance. A decent flat in a residential locality costs u a minimum of 15k with 1.5lacs advance. Certainly u would not be spending so much on shelter.

9.U cant get into a running bus in Bang....totally suxx. There are doors at the entrance, automatically closing after the stop. So its miles and miles to walk.

10. Every Hyderabadi feels Hyderabad is the best (which is not just a feeling, but a proven fact)... and for obvious other reasons.

Marathahalli and the Chocolate Factory

Well....3rd year in BITS was over, and there I was in Bangalore, ready to go into the IT world, a bit sooner than I thought. It was my first time, and I had some trouble finding the bus station. After a couple of days with my relatives, I reported at my PS station. Then came my first weekend at Marathahalli in Bangalore, where I was destined to stay for the next 5 months.
Hmm…let’s see… what can I say about that place? It would be a daunting task for me to enumerate the whole of it, but let me try and give u some glimpses of it. It’s a small “halli” at one end of Bangalore, takes an hour to reach from the city railway/bus station or even more if you get stuck in those huge traffic jams.
One of the many outstanding landmarks is the legendary “Tulasi Theatre”. The cost of the tickets can vary from day to day, from movie to movie and I can assure you that it would me a once in a lifetime experience. The projector uses the latest technology to project the movie on the walls and on the roof also, along with the screen and there is a good possibility that you might see a movie with the heads cut off. The audio also deserves a token of appreciation; the sound effects mixed with the roaring fans on the walls of the theatre can give u a headache. Nevertheless, that’s where our Saturday morning kicks off at.
Go a little further along that lane and u can find “Pavan Andhra Mess” on the first floor in a building to your right. Yup...That’s our next stop….lets go have lunch, Andhra Style. It’s the same thing over and over again dal, fry, sambar, papad and unlimited rice for 20 bucks (thanks to the inflation its now 23), but it will fill your stomach. Its obvious that u get bored after a couple of weeks, and feel like having a rich meal to satisfy your voracious appetite. There comes your next option “Biryani Day” and “Spicy House”. The look of biryani bears an uncanny resemblance to that of Hyderabadi, but you know it’s all an illusion once u start eating it. Nothing can beat Hyderabadi Biryani… but it’s a good substitute in such a place. Apart from these, there are many other spots to eat, but haven’t tried out many… but I am sure u can find the whole gamut of esoteric Indian dishes in that very street.
Hey….just forgot, breakfast... hmm… was never really a part of the BITSIAN life but here, got to get up early and work, u need something to keep u alive till lunch. “Udipi Upahar” might help you, but you will soon learn not to have breakfast at Marathahalli. Enough of eating lets go out for a bit of shopping. What can I say... it’s such a fish market out there. Typical shopping area; contains everything from Brand Factory to roadside tattoos at one stretch.
All this sounds real nice and fun; now, lets come to the bad part of it. The houses are crammed against one another horizontally; it’s quite difficult to know where one house starts and ends. The cell phone signal drops drastically within a few meters, and its only emergency mode once you enter your room thus lacking the luxury of chatting away to glory relaxing on your bed or giving missed calls to your cell if you misplaced it. If you are a smart guy, then by this time you would have understood that there is no possibility of sunlight and cool breeze coming into your room.
Then there are muscle men with hunters in their hands, to whip themselves and extort money from you (You might consider facing eunuchs instead for a change: P). The roads are pathetic, I am sure you can find better roads in villages; and when it rains, you would be hoping that you were a small kid, wearing shorts instead of formal trousers, especially if you have to wash your own clothes. It’s impossible to walk on the road with all that mud and dirt and crap without getting yourself dirty, and beware, you may always have a fall in a mud hole. The whole roads are covered with mud and dirt, and you stay out there for too long, even you will be given a garnishing of it.